Journal 7.25.2019

It is 7:10 AM on Thursday July 25th. My time as a bachelor soon comes to an end. As a result my mind is in heightened alert such as Ralphie in a Christmas Story when he visits Santa in the mall. “Wake Up Stupid, Wake UP! Wake up and take advantage of this precious free time!

You see, prior to the family leaving for two months your mind is in a state of excitement thinking of all the things you can finally do. You can do anything you want! Go on a weekend trip, read books, watch movies unsuitable for kids, take a nap, anything! This excitement lasts for the first week but then quickly dies. My mindset was half in depression for a good part of the summer and I’m not sure why. I think it might be that life has so considerably changed that chemicals in my brain tell me something is awry.

I miss my family and doing all of the things I’ve wanted to do are nice but not as exciting as I had hoped. The depression causes bad thoughts and it takes a great effort to get them to pass through. I become lethargic and the energy I had relied on to go do all the things I wanted to do just isn’t there.

But, now that my mind is in panic mode, I’m finding all sorts of energy and having positive thoughts today I tell you. It is also a good thing I got just about all of my “to-do” list done in the beginning of the summer and so do not have them hanging over my head. So the question is what to do with my weekend. One buddy wants to go get beer at a place called Devil’s Canyon Brewery on Friday. I’m reluctant to do that because beer makes me lethargic the next day and this is the important last weekend! I had also thought about taking another trip to Ohio or perhaps go visit a buddy in San Diego. I doubt either of those will happen because although I have a lot of energy that takes a lot of motivation which just isn’t there.

Well, it is time to get started on the day in a summer that is quickly passing by.

Published by 魔手

Global Citizen! こんにちは!僕の名前はマットです. Es decir soy Mateo. Aussi, je m'appelle Mathieu. Likes: Languages, Cultures, Computers, History, being Alive! \(^.^)/