Journal Entry – 5.31.2018

It is 8:23 PM on Thursday, May 31st.  The sun is setting on the ocean horizon just out of my view behind the trees.  It is this time of year that my kids tell me it is not yet bedtime as the sun is still visible.  Smart little guys.

Another sunset, another month comes to a close.  What year is it?  2018 already?  Looking at the monthly drop down of this blog and seeing so many years brings  a sobering reminder that life goes quickly and we should appreciate it.  I clicked on a few of those months and read a few posts from years back.  I simply cannot believe so much time has passed and before I know it I may be reading this post far in the future having the same thoughts.

There is a saying in that we should make every day count.  I’ve found this isn’t possible as we all to easily go on autopilot only to return to the realization of the passage of time when someone dies, a kid graduates or we finally take a moment of reflection.  This is my moment of reflection.

As I pass through these days and months in the fog of a 41 year old mind I realize that it is important to live a magical life.  The magic comes easily when we are younger but as we age and become accustomed to routine and the unique experiences rarely present themselves it is important to remind ourselves of the magic and mysteriousness of our very existence.  This realization comes back to me when I watch a really good movie or listen to a beautiful song.  It shakes me from my stupor telling me to “wake up!”  Appreciate these sunsets, thoroughly enjoy having young children and to call my parents.  Time is fleeting and soon everything changes.

Things are changing for me and this change is picking up pace.  Tomorrow is my last day at my current company and on Monday I dive right in to the new adventure.  I’ve informed my customers and made preparations for my upcoming training yet it is hard to believe that next week will not be as it has for almost seven years.  I am not anxious, nor nervous and I guess that is because I’m now “seasoned,” I know what I’m doing and I’m confident.

For the past couple of days I’ve read random blogs on WordPress.com in the ‘tags’ section.  I always gravitate to Personal and have recently been reading ‘divorce.’  I like the reminder that I do have a wonderful life and have made good decisions.  I feel sorry for those that don’t and the adults, these people who are my contemporaries that seem lost.  When I read their blogs it seems as they should be older than me but many are even younger.  They are blowing in the wind and have so many problems.  Reading the obituaries some have even passed away, kids that were just born when I was graduating high school.

When I was a kid my mom would always tell me that I had to listen to “adults.”  Yet reading these blogs I think I would give my kids the opposite advice.  These ‘adults’ are a mess!  They follow blindly a religion, divorce their partner because they never learned how to get along or make good decisions, and they are selfish.  I had always thought that ‘adult’s always had their acts together.  When you reached a certain age you received a manual on how to be a responsible person and could build a stable life.  I’ve written many times in the past how disappointed I was to discover that many adults do not have their lives together and how poorly they conducted themselves.  Through the window of social media and reading these blogs this disappointment deepens.  Half of married couples divorce and it seems that many adults just stumble through life making one poor choice after another.

At 41 I’ve decided to limit my social media and internet browsing.  It is time to turn inward and concentrate on my own life.  I don’t need to share my posts, nor do I need the validation of ‘likes’ from other people.  I write for myself to read in in the future and to understand my own mind as well as to understand this journey called life.

That is enough deep thoughts for today, I have a big step to take tomorrow and better get my rest.

Author: 魔手

Global Citizen! こんにちは!僕の名前はマットです. Es decir soy Mateo. Aussi, je m'appelle Mathieu. Likes: Languages, Cultures, Computers, History, being Alive! \(^.^)/