August 2005 Archives

I have studied foreign languages for years now and learned how to construct sentences by following some structure of pronoun, verb object and so on. However, it wasn't until I became an English teacher that I started to see my own native language with a critical eye. The most difficult to teach would have to be the idioms or silly expressions we use in English since they often do not make sense for the language learner.

However, I realized yesterday that some phrases I thought were ridiculous as a 6 year old when I first learned them still seem ridiculous now and it makes me cringe when I hear them. So I'd just like to write down some expressions in English that I find funny either as they are or how I understood them.

1. Let us break bread = Let's share a meal. I still picture some maniac running around with a hammer hitting bread all over the house and cannot supress a smile when someone says that.

2. Let us pray - As a child I heard Lettuce pray and would picture a bunch of vegetables on their knees. I still hear it this way and can't shake it.

3. The soldiers came back from the Theater - Now I checked this in the dictionary and it does not refer to a battlefield in any way in either the American or English spelling. Is it that they are trying to make a war seem elegant like the theater?

4. "Boots on the ground." - Again a wartime expression for getting soldiers to a specific area and I still picture some cobbler throwing the boots he made on the ground.

5. You're up a creek (pronounced krik) without a paddle - It means that you are in trouble with no way out. I still picture it as myself in an actual canoe with no paddles.

6. When Christians speak with "Thou, Thee" and other silly pronouns. As a language learner I see these people using language to try to make themselves seem profound when to me it just seems silly. The Church often does this to make their proclamations seem holier than just normal English.

Well, that's about it for now. Feel free to post any other expressions you find silly but are still in common usage.

There have been a few thoughts going through my head that do not deserve a full fledged post but I still wanted to write about. Some about Vietnam, and some about my experiences abroad in general. So I thought I'd combine them all in one post and get them out.

The first deals with my experiences abroad in general. As I watch America become polarized with people blindly following the left or right, it disturbs me. It disturbs me because I was once like that and America was once a perfect country in my mind until I disovered new sources of information abroad. This post is not bashing America in any way and I still think that America is light years ahead of most places in the world. We still have freedom of speech and the right to express our ideas without fear of retribution (usually). America is free and we can better ourselves more easily than in most places. This is what I love about America.

However, as I found out when I went abroad, there were certain aspects about America that were not taught to me in Americans schools. Whole periods of history were skipped over if it might paint America in a bad light. Many countries condemn Japan for referring to the invasion of China as simply an "advance," and skip right over the massacres. This has been done in America as well. Again, this is not a post to bash America and the reason I write about it, is that I was completely shocked when I found out.

The first time it really hit me was when a friend from Panama bluntly stated, "Your country invaded my country." I couldn't believe it. It was not really in the news and I hadn't been taught about any invasions. He told me the story of how one day he woke up to find American snipers on roof tops and how America suddenly changed his government. Speaking with other Latinos, I found that America has done similar things in many other Latin American countries. Yet, ironically, a passport to America is one of the most prized possessions they can receive and is akin to winning the lottery.

America's government has done some pretty awful things, but still the citizens of other countries would still like to go there and see it as a place where they can fufill their dreams.

But I really wish I would have been taught about all the bad things the government has done such as the "fire storming" of Tokyo where 100,000 defenceless citizens were killed, the Invasions of Panama and Greneda, Vietnam from a Vietnamese point of view and so on.

Upon reading this post, most people (especially now) will condemn me if they are from the right since they most likely follow America blindly, or completely agree from the left and say just how bad America has become. But what I have learned from being abroad, is that one should not be too much on the right or the left. One should drop all the nationalism, propoganda and simply read History as it is which can be very difficult to do since most sources are inherently biased. In America, the schools will teach mostly the good things America has done, while America's enemies will teach only the bad things America has done. Yet the truth lies in the middle. America has done some horrible things, but also many great things as well.

On the overall I think America still has a better track record than most governments in the world and has acheived more for it's citizens than most.

--------Now on to Saigon----------

I have learned much from being here. One has to do with being stingy. If you are a foreigner in this country, there are many many people who will be asking you for money since they are so poor. There are many times when people will try to rip you off and look at you as a cash cow. Yet, instead of begining to hate them, we have to see life from their point of view. They are poor and simply trying to make a living the best way they know how. Most foreigners, after living here for a while, become stingy due to the constant requests for money and usually pay the exact amount of some price. One should keep in mind that a little tip of even as little as 30 cents will be greatly appreciated. But foreigners do become stingy and refuse to pay even a little tip since they have been harassed for money for so long.

Again, it is best to remain generous but not too much. If you give too much then you will invite more harrassment and they will become dependent on it. The same goes for people on welfare in the USA. They should be taught skills so they can survive on their own without constant handouts. If you give them too much they will probably blow it and continually ask for more. The bible says it best when Jesus said you should teach the people to fish, instead of simply giving it to them.

Another thing I have learned from being here is a foreigner should not stop to help those that are in trouble on the street. If one wants to help the Vietnamese they should do so through established institutions and be charitable through them. Perhaps I could best explain through an example.

A friend of mine witnessed a careless person driving a motorbike and he hit an old lady on a bicycle. The old woman the ground pretty hard and the motorbike sped away. My friend seeing that nobody was stopping to help went out in the street and tried to care for the old woman. Soon a crowd gathered and as he could understand Vietnamese, the people around started accusing him of causing the accident. They then told him if they paid them off they would stop accusing him. The point of the story is that as a foreigner here you are a mark. If you give some people the opportunity to take advantage they will (It's better in Saigon than in Hanoi though).

I too, saw a very emancipated man fall in the street next to the curb during heavy traffic. He might have been on drugs because he just lay there shaking. I did not stop to help. My conscious and upbrining tells me I should but reason tells me I should not since there is nothing I can really do. I cannot even call the police since I can't speak Vietnamese. Even if I could, the police would come and might try to take me in or accuse me of hitting the man with my bike. If I had stopped, it would have made me vulnerable and I probably would have gotten into some trouble even though I hadn't done anything. I came back that same way two hours later and the guy was still there. Nobody had stopped to help. Perhaps they thought too that he is on drugs and probably had been helped before only to return to this state. It's a terrible situation but the point of the story is I felt guilty, but was powerless to offer any help at all. What could I do? And if I did something, I probably would have gotten into trouble with the police most likely detained, and then have to bribe my way out of it.

Another story is of my friend who had a bad accident on his motorbike. He was pretty much incapacitated and his girlfriend being a foreigner couldn't speak Vietnamese. So she handed the phone to a passer by, pointed and asked for help. She was hoping the guy would call an ambulance or something but instead he took the phone and ran away. The motorbike ended up missing too somehow.

The point of these stories is that Vietnam is a great place and people should remain generous but do it from a point of strength. If you become vulnerable here then you will most likely be taken advantage of.

I know most people who read this blog are making impressions of Vietnam and I have to say that these are bad stories and do not reflect Vietnam as a whole. The Vietnamese people are some of the kindest and good hearted people I have ever met (especially in Saigon). But they are poor and some bad people live here as well and will take advantage if given the opportunity. Most are not bad people however, and foreigners must remain generous and willing to help out, but not be foolish about it.

This is an entry I've been thinking about writing for a long time. Here in Saigon our Western news comes from the BBC (Good Reporting) and CNN (Complete Nonsense Network).

My main complaint comes from the endless commercials for Christiane Amanpour. In the commercial she is seen running through the trenches of some war torn part of the world in her designer coat and scarf, then goes on to explain what being a "war correspondent" is all about. It's not that I don't think reporters should not report on what is happening, but her reports are using war as entertainment and she is doing it for her own glory and fame.

Not many years back, the "war correspondent" was being glamorized as such a dangerous profession and how these journalists were "heros." They would be on the covers of magazines with a microphone in hand and a bullet proof vest on looking proud to be doing what they do. There were short video clips of journalists undergoing training such as crawling under barbed wire, jumping muddy ditches and so on. Is it only me who can see how ridiculous all of this is?

These people use such an awful, devestating ruiner of other peoples lives that war is, for fame, money and to make it entertainment. If I was the commander of an army during a conflict, I swear I would have to send a rocket or two towards the five star hotel where they all stay.

The reports of CNN carry absolutely no depth what so ever and the public is spoon feed quick summaries of what the conflict is all about. I would have to say a much better site is Aljazeera which keeps a whole section devoted to the war and is much more informative than any crap CNN spews out.

Not more than 15 years ago, there were news magazines and entertainment magazines. It seems now that the two have been combined and CNN does not report news anymore but entertains the public and will make the headlines any sort of entertainment that it thinks will sell more papers. The articles are very brief and only explain what happened with no reasoning behind it or more in-depth information.

As you know, I get most of my information about the USA from the News. I haven't actually lived there in 4 years, so my feelings about the country always come from the outside looking in.

Reading the news today, I see that this "Intelligent Design" issue is sweeping the nation with States actually passing laws saying it must be taught. It seems the extremist Christians simply do not want to lay down and admit defeat in the Evolution / Creationist issue and thus are slipping religion in through the back door. I remember watching some play turned movies about midwest housewives going on a crusade against Evolution and it being taught in schools while burning books, and getting very angry. They called science "Evil." Doesn't this sound just a little like the extremists in the Middle East now? Isn't there some comparison?

For me, I read the news and in my own mind, I wish the Middle Eastern states would turn secular and drop religion from the government. But it seems we haven't done so in the USA either.

Evolution has been proven time and time again, but it seems man simply cannot accept that he is the product of a random set of events and needs to feel there is "a higher being" looking out for him like a child. Man has called himself the image of God, and points to the perfectness of the body. Isn't this the pinnacle of arrogance? And how is the body in any way perfect when we are subject to cancer, have parts that dont' make sense, like men having nipples, tonsils appendix, and wisdom teeth that cause us so much pain? They also point to the "perfectness" of the Universe when it is really a place of such violent destruction and rebirth.

I also remember the Church not wanting to let go of the idea that the Earth is the center of the universe. It took them about 400 years to apologize and admit they were wrong. The fact is, most religious scriptures are mans attempt to explain his surroundings and purpose. If there were no explanation and a benevolent God then most people would be very frightened indeed. The idea that we evolved due to random events and inhabit a rock floating in an immense blackness would scare the wits out of any religious person. It is almost like man is a parentless abandoned Child who insists that his creators have are still around and care for him even when there is so much death and destruction going on and the creator never shows up. In mankind's mind, he convinces himself so thoroughly that it breeds religion, an institution, empire, in which the faithful will believe anything the organization teaches without any proof at all. It's just like any kid will believe anything his parents say.

"Intelligent Design" is a pathetic cry, yelling "I am special, I am from the Gods, I couldn't possibly be just an accident, I AM SPECIAL!"

As an adventurer and someone who is not afraid to venture into the unknown, it does not frighten me that I might be a product of random events and floating on some rock in infinate darkness. I do think that there are unseen or unknown forces, dimensions that exist outside our own and my understanding of why I am here or where I am is nil. Of course when I say it this way it may sound crazy to the "religious." They would much prefer to think that God created us and looks out for us when we only understand one tiny speck called the Solar System floating and billions and billions of other specs called galaxies which get swallowed up and reborn over billions and billions of years. Just as I'm unafraid to go into another country, learn the langauge and call it home, I'm also not afraid of dying and where I will end up or what adventure I will have in the afterlife. I exist now, and there is no reason to think I won't again.

For the Christians who say I'm going to hell for this, I must say I have read their teachings which state those that did not accept Jesus will go to hell. So heaven must be inhabited mostly by white people who with all their rules about morality and how life should be lived will most likely do the same in the afterlife and will constantly tell me I'm "damaged goods" (Adam and Eve) and must repent repent repent. So how fun could that be? It would be much better to go to where all the Asian Buddhists go after they die since we might actually be able to have fun in the afterlife! Or perhaps I am a demon since I really really like the Sauna and Steambaths and feel so great after taking two of them. Perhaps I am simply longing to go back to my natural environment of heat, hot and that which purges my body of the impurities!!!

HA!

Tonight I went out with a friend of mine to a local Australian Pub called the Blue Geko. It's a great place to meet drunk Australians who are really open and easy to talk to. One guy shared a story with us about how he got conned out of 200 australian dollars and one million dong. He had hired a motorbike taxi who took him to all the usual sights, and then to a girly bar in the evening. He was sat down and a lot of girls came in. He chose a few to sing karaoke with but about an hour after all the girls left and three Vietnamese came in with a bill totaling $276 USD. They wouldn't let him leave without paying, so he at first put down a million dong but they said no and wanted the full amount. He wouldn't pay so they started beating the motorbike taxi driver. He said it was all staged and as an ex-pat in Saigon, I would have to agree with him. The motorbike taxi driver probably took a few blows for a handsome kickback from the thugs. Finally the tourist got freaked out and pulled out all the money he had after which they let him go.

It's not uncommon to get scammed like that in poor countries and tourists have to watch out. If you are taken to any shady places, it's best to leave right away without ordering anything. Even in Japan I have heard stories of the Yakuza doing stuff like that in the shadier districts. You have to be on your guard when in a city you don't know, especially a poor one.

As an ex-pat this stuff never has happend to me because I don't let myself get taken to shady joints and have learned how to get out of certain situations without losing my cool. That really is the key, which is to remain calm, smile, and work your way out of it. If I was in that situation, I would have pulled out my cell phone and called some influential Vietnamese. They might have taken my cell away, but they can be intimidated if it's done in the right way. You just have to keep cool, refuse to pay and let them play their game. But really one shouldn't let themselves get into that situation which is the best defence. I did have one incident at the coconut stand where I didn't negotiate the price first and they gave me two coconuts which I drank. Also, it was in broad daylight and in the middle of a busy street so I was safe anyway. They wanted to charge me twice the price and refused to let me leave. It really wasn't that expensive but I refused to pay that price on principal. I pulled out my cell and started to call an influential friend. Once they saw that the let me leave.

A tourist does not know how to get out of such situations and therefore are easy targets.

It's been a while since my last blog simply due to my own lazyness. Here in Saigon it is easy to become lazy and lethargic.

It is common knowledge that most people who come to live for any amount of time in Asia never want to go back to the rat race of the West. This applies mostly to men since the women are very nice and easy going here. Also, men can be in control since they will definately be richer than the woman and perhaps many men still need to feel in control of the relationship.

Saigon is a very small town and the business environment is unique. The Chamber of Commerce directories read like an old acquaintence book and from the outside it seems impressive since most of the long term ex-pats are here to lead their international companies in this market.

For me, I work at the Town and Country Club and it is my job to go to all the events and try to get more members for our club as well as more business. However, as most business people in medium size towns know, these events can seem boring after a while since you see the same people over and over again. On the other hand, you'll always have someone to talk to. There are also so many young business people here and most of the Vietnamese Entrepreneurs here are also relatively young and rich. So it's all very exciting for a while, but after a while going out all the time gets old like anything else.

Here is a snapshot of my usual week for those curious about life here for an ex-pat.

I go into work for a few hours and follow up with prospects for the club. Usually I'll have a few lunch appointments during the week where I bring people in to the Town Club, have lunch and explain what the club is about. Then Monday night is either spent at home or playing darts. On Tuesday there is the darts league which is about 150 players and 12 teams. Everyone has their home bar and we play at different bars around the city. My team is the "Really Rottens" and we aren't doing to bad at the moment. On Wednesday I usually hit the gym or go to the pool in the evening. Thursday is golfing night where we play under the lights at Saigon South on a short 9 hole course and of course there are usually beers afterwards. Friday is like Friday anywhere, and there might be a party at one of the bars around town where you go and catch up with the people you may have not seen in at least three weeks. Saturday I sit on my computer most of the day and surf the net. On Sunday morning/afternoon there are buffets at the three biggest hotels for US $21 which is a nice treat.

I'm getting bored just writing this blog, but it was mentioned that others might be interested in seeing what life is really like for us here. It isn't terribly exciting, but where else can you meet the whole town and always know people wherever you go who also happen to have a nice position in some international company. It is not luxurious in the least bit like Paris, Madrid or Tokyo but Saigon has it's own charm. Everyone will smile at you here if you smile at them and finding a girlfriend is as easy as picking up a loaf of bread.

If you get tired of talking with the same people, the tourists also add a little spice to the mix. You can always go to a bar and meet someone who still thinks of Vietnam as exotic and be part of their experience. There aren't many American tourists here yet, but plenty of Australians and Japanese. It's always interesting to see what brought them here and what their lives are like back in their home countries. For some reason they all say we have it made here.

Their daily experience and mine are also quite different. I'm usually in suit pants a tie and on a motorbike. So I'm not bothered by all the vendors trying to sell their items like the tourists are. Should I walk outside in regular clothes and without my motorbike I too will be treated like a tourist and be bothered. But if you live here it will go away and become a rather pleasant place to live.

I really cannot express just how kind the Vietnamese people are. As a tourist they might seem a little pushy trying to sell their goods, but when you are not a tourist you can see just how great they really are.